Articles - Home and All Alone with Sounds from the Crypt

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Systems Inc.
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Home and All Alone with Sounds from the Crypt:

Here are some things to quell your fears with those scary sounds.
THE OWNER of the older home was distraught. "I heard it again just tonight and I know I'm not imagining things. There is someone in this house. Those are footsteps, and someone is walking from the front of the house to the rear. I know it." The house in question was being renovated completely; the upstairs was unoccupied.

Old houses (and new houses, for that matter) rarely seem to make sounds when it's bright and sunny. Only when the night is dark and the weather gloomy do the noises begin.

The owner had been through a myriad of "ordinary" scary sounds: The "burglar" scratching at the windows (a branch moving slightly in the wind); the hissing boa constrictor that became annoyed when the heat came on (a loose radiator valve); the clackaclacka that surely signaled the imminent collapse of the house (uneven expansion of heating pipes as the hot water comes through).

Even even an experienced renovator can find himself spending a shaky quarter of an hour chasing the invisible lead-footed intruder stomping back and forth across the upper floors of the house. The footsteps were even, solid and intimidating. Their source turned out to be a raised seam tin roof lifting slightly in the wind and falling back into place with a credible imitation of a second story artist.

If you aren't too busy being frightened by them, house sounds can tell you where to put your fix-up efforts and dollars. Here are a few noteworthy noises:

CLUNKA CLUNKA in the plumbing when the washing machine shuts off its water supply. When the automatic valve in the washer snaps shut, the water expends its momentum by shaking the pipes. To silence this slamming, make sure the pipe runs are well secured every 4 feet and/or install a capped 12" to 18" vertical pipe section on both supply lines near the washing machine. This will trap air and act as a shock absorber. Cost: $3 to $4 for materials and less than an hour's labor. Commercial bladder type water hammer devices are available from building supply stores usually for $60 and up.

KABOOM when forced-air heat comes on or off. It may sound like a rerun of independence Day, but most likely it is the ductwork bulging and collapsing as the system's air handler comes on and off. The metal walls of the ducting are probably too thin and hence aren't strong enough to resist expanding and contracting with the associated bass drum noise. Such ducting runs can often be braced and secured to eliminate this "oil canning" noise. Cost: Labor.

BRATTATTAT when you slowly open or close a faucet. Probably caused by a worn valve stem that vibrates as it is pushed by the first rush of water between the seat and washer. To cure, replace the stem. Cost: about $3 for parts and 30 minutes of labor.

TICK TICK TICK inside a wall, usually in a newer house equipped with plastic drain and waste water pipes. Many times these plastic pipes are strapped tightly to the studs inside the wall. When a dishwasher or similar source discharges hot water, the pipes expand slightly and scrape against the wood or strap. To shut off this "clock," loosen the strap, which sometimes can be found in the attic. If the pipe is strapped down too far, however, you will have to cut away a section of wall or simply get used to the noise. Cost: labor.

RUMBLE GURGLE POP from the water heater. This is usually caused by buildup of sediment on the bottom of the heater tank. The sediment flakes or bubbles up when the heat cuts on. Stop the bubbling by draining the tank every 6 months or so. This techniques won't work for every heater. If you don't flush out any sediments with the first 5 gallons of water, forget it. Cost: Labor.

WHOOM when the gas furnace, oven or water heater goes on. This is often caused by a dirty burner that keeps the gas from igniting as it enters the chamber. Get that burner cleaned, and quickly! Old furnaces and boilers frequently suffer from rusty burners that can be brushed or vacuumed. Be certain to turn the thermostat down and cut off your service switch, fuse or circuit breaker before dusting off. Cost: labor, or the price of a service call from a competent mechanic.

WHOOMP A BUMP when the oil burner cuts on, usually accompanied by soot around the burner and flue areas. This is usually caused by poor burner adjustment. The problem can be fixed by your oil supplier or service representative, under a yearly maintenance contract costing $50 to $75. This service contract is a must for homes with oil furnaces.

SQUEAK SQUEAK when someone walks on the stairs or across the floor. Caused by sections of wood rubbing together or up and down across the nails that secure them. To silence, tighten the loose areas by renailing with a "power nailer" available from tool rental outlets or drill pilot holes (to avoid cracking the floor) and drive finish nails into the support timbers below. If the noisy floor is made of plywood, roll up the carpeting and renail with resin coated nails. Cost: labor, or about $16 per day for a power nailer, plus nails.

HISS HISS from steam radiators. Most likely caused by steam leaking from the packing in an inlet valve or (on one-pipe systems) a frozen air escape valve. Cure by repacking the inlet valve or replacing the air escape valve. Cost: about $20 per inlet valve for repacking and about $6 per air escape valve replacement.

BANG RATTLE CLANG as the heat rises in an old steam radiator system. Caused by hot steam meeting cooler pipes or returning water. Unfortunately, this appears to be the nature of the beast and should be chalked up to "charm."

ROCK & ROLL from the condominium next door. Caused by lack of neighborly consideration. Solve with direct communication or build a false wall, insulated with fiberglass and caulked at top, bottom and at any switch or plug plates. Cost: possible friendship and $300 to $400 per room.

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